God I hope I get it. I hope I get it! How many people does he need?

Day 17

It's days like these that remind you why you love theatre.

I got a role in a RROAPS play. And not just any role, the role that I was hoping for duiring the audition process. To see the cast list with my name on it...it's just pure joy. That's the only way I can describe it. You get so much disappointment as an actor. You are constantly told no, no, no, no, hell no, maybe...but no, and no. It's very seldom that you get those yes-es to be involved in a show. Some go a whole year getting yes after yes and then the next get nothing but no's. It's nice to see that yes through your name on a list.

I've had a whole lotta no's recently. And it's discouraging sometimes when they keep piling up on you. I let it get to me sometimes, just because being told that you can't be involved in something that you love to do and dedicate your life to is discouraging. Downright depressing actually. But, I don't make that the case for me. I'll give myself a day to be depressed, and then the next I'll make my own yes's. You can settle for the no's, but there are so many opprotunities outside of school to do what you love. And that's what I have discovered this year. While I've been told no in one theatre, I've been accepted and taught at other theatres within the same city. It's a comfort to know that I can still get the education I need. I don't want to be paying all this money to only sit around at night watching t.v. I want to be out, rehearsing, acting, learning, doing something!

I've got one yes down this weekend, one to go. Although I have a strange incling that some outside force brought me to RROAPS to prepare me for this next audition. There are a lot of people going for very few roles, so I understand if I don't get picked. But I sure would like to use my talents to their full possible potential.