Cause some days I think I'm dying, but I'm really only trying to get through...

Day 39

KL;DJF;AKJFAKDSFNCSINJMDLAKFDAK;FJKD;NFAKDJCNAKDFANFCJK!

That can best describe how my day went in Principles II today.

I don't normally get so frustrated in class, and if I do it's usually at myself. But today I just got so peeved. I don't know what it was.

Well, yes I do. I feel like I'm going to be "that bitchy girl" in class now. We're still doing the character scenes and after they are done the class gets to critique them. And all everybody is saying is good things. This was good, that was great, I liked this moment. There are only a few other critiques. And so, I want to help them out. They aren't going to learn anything from people telling them how good they were when there are things that didn't work. So I'm chiming in with negative critiques. Stuff that I saw that didn't work or didn't feel right. And so now I feel like I'm a bitch because I'm the only one that's saying anything bad!

But at the same time, I don't feel like a bitch. I have their best interest at heart. If I was a real bitch, I would just say mean things for the hell of it. I'm not. I'm giving them legitimate critiques that will help them out. Things that they may not have even noticed. I guess I'm frustrated because I came from another principles II class that wasn't afraid to be negative. If there was something that didn't work, someone would bring it up and we could discuss it. I guess I took that for granted. I guess it might be because about 85% of the class are freshmen or new students. Or maybe I'm just expecting too much out of them. I don't know.

I just want that mentality back. I want to be in a classroom environment where we can be completely honest with each other and learn and grow from that. If I suck, I want somebody to tell me that I suck. It may it me hard, but it would be a lot worse to not hear it and go through life thinking everything is fine. If you are going to do this acting thing for real, you are going to hear that and much worse from the outside world. If you can't take it, then find a new profession. I can take it. I want to hear it if it's true. BE HONEST!!!

I just want to grow as an actor, is that too much to ask???